questions...

Today, I'm going through the hard drives and back-ups of everything I've done for the past 7-8 years of ministry.  I've copied and pasted and deleted many many files.  As I look through and see what's been accomplished in the past years, I smile. I also well-up as I wonder what's going to happen?  What;s going to happen with my kids? What's going to happen to me?
I started going down the dangerous path of "Why am I doing this?"  It's a legitimate question, but sinful in its lack of faith.  God has an amazing plan for us!  I know it! It's just hard to think about as your looking at old videos and photos of your kids - a lot of them who have already grown up and gone off to college.
Is this pit in my stomach going to heal?  Yes. I believe it is; but only with lots of prayer, hugs and patience.
I love you Jesus!

A tough but unavoidable milestone

Tonight was the last time teaching at CRASH.  It's bitter sweet - Knowing that I'm doing my best to follow God's call to take the step of faith He has called me to while choking back tears as I look into the face of the teens that I have grown to love so much.  

I struggled for hours thinking about what my last teaching would be. Do I teach about God's amazing love? Should I talk about "my story" and how I came to know Jesus?  Too many good topics when you serve such and amazing God!  I moved on to encouraging my kids to "keep their eyes on the prize", and "run the race" - Run hard! Dream big! Focus on the goal! Never look back! 


"²⁴ Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. ²⁵ Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. ²⁶ Therefore I do not run like someone running aimlessly; I do not fight like a boxer beating the air. ²⁷ No, I strike a blow to my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize."   1 Corinthians 9:24-27 (NIV)
I so desire for each of these wonderful teens to grow to be the man or woman of God that He has designed them to be. I want to hear great stories of these guys growing up and changing their worlds; being unashamed of the Gospel; proclaiming it boldly; loving others and seeing them through the eyes of our Heavenly Father!
Father God, be with these teenagers. Protect them and keep them in the shadow of your wings. Bless them to blessings to others. Teach them to see others as you see them, and to love others with Your love. Grow in them hearts that are hungry fro the truth and Spirits that are unquenchable. For Your glory... Amen.

Another step...

Today, I just sent in a 20 question application - 8 pages of "Tony" information.  It took almost 2 days to complete it, but I finished!  Hopefully, that church likes what it sees.

At first it seemed laborious, but I'm glad I did it. It was incredibly introspective.  How often do we take hours-upon-hours to look at ourselves? How often do we question our own beliefs and why we do the things we do?  It was very enlightening.

Show me Your Way, Lord!

It made me realize the accomplishments that God has allowed me to be a part of.  It was encouraging to see that what I do can make a difference... And it's really satisfying too!  

I don't know if this is the church God has for us. We are praying a lot and seeking His face. In the instance, a "no" is almost as good as a "yes".

Walking Out the Transition

So today is another day in the "transition of a lifetime". At least that's how it seems.  It may not be as grand as I am stating, but right now - in the middle of it - it seems huge!

Today was the third interview with a church. The first was a month ago, the second last week. This one was by Skype. That was a little awkward, but what do you do.

I continue to pray as God leads us down this new path. Where will we end up?  Cincinnati, Pittsburgh, Kansas City, Houston, San Diego, Budapest, Taiwan, or some city in Africa?  Only God knows right now... And I'm totally cool with that.  I can kick back (spiritually speaking) and allow His amazing Spirit to guide us; Watch as He walks with us during the interviews;  Smile as we see Him move in the "yeses" and the "nos". He is so very good!

Now, I believe I know how Alice must have felt as she was tumbling down that rabbit hole.  Where will it lead?

Who am I?

As I have been interviewing for new ministry positions around the country, I have been asked many questions. One of the hardest is, "Who are you?"
Sometimes its hard to express who you are. I've attempted to do that here. The picture is described as it pertains to "Who I am"

Who I am:

(Upper left to lower right)

·          The mission team to Budapest - Best trip ever.  Makes me cry every time I think about it.

·          Tradition meets gym shoes - It who I am!

·          The tower of St. Margaret’s Church - Stanford le Hope, England. The site of many great mission trips

·          The Sauerkraut Gang - Some of the best friends anyone could ask for.

·          Bacon! - ‘nuff said!

·          Cheese - Proof that we serve a good and benevolent God

·          A close up of me and my best friend, Donna.

·          Guitar - Nothing like worshipping with my guitar

·          Mom - At 82, she’s still more active than most people. She a good friend and my hero!

·          The Mission Never Ends - Our 2009 missions motto, and a great way to view the great commission.

·          I love teaching others. Nothing like a teenager with a power tool!

·          Jim Holland - My best friend, my brother, my accountability partner.

·          1969 GTO Convertible - Midnight blue with a white rag top and interior - My dream car.

·          Confrontation Point 2011 - The deck we built for Miss Tammy and her girls.

·          The grill - I’m a guy. I like fire. I grill!

·          Lauren and Rusty Twigg - My favorite wedding I ever officiated!

·          Our Christmas photo - love my wife and dogs!

·          The Shih Tzu - Reminds me of my first dog, Oscar.

·          Music - It has always been important to me. There is something special about singing and playing.

·          Crossword - I love a good puzzle!

·          Stained Glass - I love art. I love looking at things in new and different ways.

·          1966 Dodge Dart - My first car. I think I’d rather have that, than the GTO dream car.

·          Worship and Sunsets - It’s like saying “Goodnight” to Jesus. I love to worship - If it can be done in nature, all the more better!

·          Donna and snow - I love the joy in her eyes. She takes little for granted and appreciates the little things.

·          Budapest - What a beautiful city!  I love Hungary, Hungarian people & culture, even Hungarian food - Pass the Paprika!

·          Candles and Bible study - There’s something almost holy about reading the Bible by candlelight.

·          Fall Retreat 2011 - My last one. I love my kids!

·          I’ve learned to never take my self too seriously!

·          Westminster Abby - I love the UK and her people

·          Mountains - I love them despite my paralyzing fear of heights.  How can one look at a beautiful mountain range and not believe in God?

·          Archeology - I am an archeology and Egyptology buff.  I like to read about, watch shows about it and talk about it. Take me to the museum… Please!

·         M.C. Escher - Relativity - Up is down, down is up, out is in! So cool.

Getting Started

So... I figured it was time to start a blog.  Not that anyone would be interested in what I do or have to say, but I have caved to the societal pressure!

Here's what's shakin' in our lives right now...

I am currently in the process of finding a new ministry in which to serve.  This is the most difficult time with the most difficult decisions I've ever had. I'm not sure where God is taking us, I just know that we are in His mighty grip!  And that is sufficient and that is awesome! I tell people, "It's the most exciting, terrifying time in our lives!"

As I keep this blog moving over the next days, weeks, months I hope to bring you along on this journey.  I ask that you pray for Donna and me as we continue to seek God's will for our lives.  

"Show us YOUR path, oh Lord, that we may glorify you in all that we do... wherever that may be, wherever You make take us. Our desire is to follow You."  

"If you lead me, Lord, I will follow. Where you lead me, Lord, I will go... I will go"